cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I would ride that face into the sunset
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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