I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
