It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
