also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
