hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
