it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
