If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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