I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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