You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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