I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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