There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
