make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
