feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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