I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Randomize
