So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
