I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
