Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
