I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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