Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
