Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize