And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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