Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize