all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
