hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
