and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
