so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Randomize
