Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
