I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
