I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
