Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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