Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
