what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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