So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize