you mean i was at the winter classic?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
