Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
vagina is talking i cant
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
She's just so happy...and so naked.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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