i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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