She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Randomize
