im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
