Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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