So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo