We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
