I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
