the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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