That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
