she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
