i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
