your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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