it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
