She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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