he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize