I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
